Fear is based in the unknown. In any given situation, there’s always a chance you could fail or lose. Being unable to know the outcome can make you balk at a new opportunity rather than take it. However, see the unknown as something to be embraced rather than feared. There is a chance something could go wrong, but there’s always a chance it could be a positive experience. The more chances you take, the more you increase your likelihood of success. The next time you feel fearful in the face of a new challenge, remind yourself you could succeed. Remember the unknown is not always bad and, worst case scenario, there will be other chances in the future.
Rewards are a bigger motivational factor than many people realize. Rewards may actually account for about three quarters of the reason people do things. However, you’re unlikely to get rewarded every time you said “Yes” to something at work, or each time you check an item off your to-do list. Therefore, reward yourself. Give yourself a small treat or reward. You can, for example, allow yourself to spend a night out with friends if you agree to take on an extra task at work that week.
Do everything you reasonably can do each day rather than putting it off. Remind yourself you don’t know what will happen tomorrow. For example, you find yourself thinking, “I don’t need to proofread that report now. I can do it tomorrow morning during downtime. " Counter this thought with something like, “What if I don’t have downtime tomorrow? What if there’s an issue in the office I need to take care of?” This will motivate you to proofread your report right now.
For example, your boss asks if anyone can stay late to help with a project. You want to go home and relax, as it’s been a long week. Someone with a can-do attitude would eagerly say “Yes” to this, but you’re exhausted and want to go to bed. Instead of thinking about how you feel now, look to the future. Yes, you will probably have a bad day today, but think about the positives in the future. This will make you look like a hard worker. The next time a promotion comes along, your boss may look to you over other employees.
When you experience a setback, remember your positive qualities. Think about your capabilities and everything you have going for you. [6] X Expert Source Sandra PossingLife Coach Expert Interview. 15 July 2020. Remind yourself one small misfire in an otherwise successful life is not worth beating yourself up. See if there’s anything to be learned. Sometimes, setbacks are beyond your control. However, review how you acted in the situation. Is there anything you could have done differently? If so, try to see this as a learning opportunity rather than a waste of time and effort.
Find a role model. Do you know someone who is highly self-efficacious? If so, then this person could be a great role model for you as you work to develop your own self-efficacy and can-do attitude. Reflect on your accomplishments. Think back on goals you have accomplished and other achievements that make you feel proud. This can help you to see that you have the power to influence your future. Work towards one goal at a time. Trying to take on too much may hider a sense of self-efficacy because you may become overwhelmed by everything you want to accomplish. Instead, focus on just one goal at a time. Surround yourself with supportive people. You may also have an easier time of building your self-efficacy if you spend time with people who believe in you and encourage you. Steer clear of people who put you down or who discourage your efforts. [8] X Research source
Remember that people view situations differently. One person may see missing the last train to work as an opportunity to enjoy a nice walk before a long work day. The other person may see it as a disaster. You can choose which of these life views to embrace. Opting for positivity over catastrophic thinking will be more energizing. You will be more eager to say “Yes” to new opportunities and experiences as you won’t be as emotionally drained.
Challenge your knee-jerk excuses. For example, your boss asks you to make a presentation at a big conference. Your immediate thought is, “I can’t do this. I don’t have time. I don’t know enough about the subject. " Stop immediately. Do not think about why you can’t do the presentation. Instead, focus on the ways you can could conceivably achieve. For example, instead think, “This will be a challenge, but I can do it. How can I make time for this? What should I do to learn more about this subject?”
You will learn to filter out negative people fast. You may know someone in your office who’s prone to complaining about all their setbacks. You may find when you share positive news with that person, they respond with disinterest or disdain. You don’t want someone else’s negativity to rub off on you. Instead of sharing good news with this person, talk to someone who’s generally positive and encouraging.
Avoid negative phrases. When you catch yourself saying, “I can’t” or “It’s impossible,” try to rephrase. Instead, say something like, “Sounds like a challenge. " When people ask you how you’re doing, phrase it in a positive way. Respond with something like, “I’m doing great. How are you?” If you do need to express negative emotions, work on tapering your expression. For example, don’t say, “My mom really made me mad today. " Instead, say something like, “I’m a little annoyed with my mom right now. "
Try keeping a thought log where you write down unhelpful thoughts you have throughout the day. Then, write down something positive you could think about instead. [13] X Expert Source Sandra PossingLife Coach Expert Interview. 15 July 2020. When you think poorly of yourself or a situation, pause. Think to yourself, “What is a better way to view this situation?” For example, you have a lot of deadlines coming up at work. You think to yourself, “I can’t do this. It’s too much. " Pause and think, “What’s a better way to look at this?” Figure out a better way to view this situation. Instead, think something like, “This will be a challenge, but I know I’m a capable person. "
Maintaining good relationships with supportive friends and family. Looking to the future to feel better about your current situation. Working towards your goals regularly, even if you can only do something small. Looking for opportunities to learn more about yourself.
Start each morning silently saying “thank you” to yourself. You don’t need to have anything in particular to be grateful about, but practicing this mantra will put you in a positive mindset. [17] X Expert Source Sandra PossingLife Coach Expert Interview. 15 July 2020. Keep a gratitude journal where you write down the specific things you’re thankful for. Remember to avoid generalizations. Do not say, “I’m grateful for my friends. " Instead say, “I’m grateful for how caring and supporting my friends are. “[18] X Research source Try to even be grateful for negative situations. For example, think something like, “It’s too bad Claire and I broke up, but I’m grateful I got out of a relationship that wasn’t working. "
Strive for at least 7 minutes of meditation each day. You can take a meditation class. You can also find guided routines online.
Eat plenty of fruits, vegetables, lean meats, and whole grains. Strive to get some exercise in each day. Make sure you get enough sleep each night.
